| HOW IS BABBY FORMED |
[Jul. 11th, 2009|11:10 pm] |
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| |  contemplative | ] |
I now actually have the doujinshi where this icon was taken from (I downloaded like...over thirty *_* because they were all together in several zipped files), and I have to say that the person who colored it did a fabulous job. Guh, I love P x E. I know it's pretty unoriginal of me and that there's tons of it, but I just can't help it. Phoenix is kinda obsessed wtih Edgeworth; Edgeworth would do just about anything for him. LOL @ how when Phoenix is royally pissed at Edgeworth for leaving his "special note," he gets Yuna Syndrome and continually refers to Edgeworth just as "him" and "that man." Aaand I totally forgot how hilarious Edgeworth is, with his "Psycholocks" business.
Although Godot/Phoenix is starting to look pretty good to me, too, after playing through most of Trials in Tribulations. And theeeeen I will have replayed all four lawyerly games. God, everytime I look at scans for the new Edgeworth game, I nearly crap my pants in excitement.
Anyway, some of the things these characters say are just... I mean, seriously, how am I not supposed to make the connections I do? Example:
Godot (to Phoenix): "You know, seeing you squirm like that reminds me...of a certain coffee's bitter-sweet bite."
(insert Phoenix wondering what kind of coffee Godot's been drinking, blah blah)
Maya: "It's not coffee, it's love! It's love that's bittersweet."
SHE SAID IT, NOT ME. It works, man, it just does. Because Mia lives on through Phoenix in a very big way, and Godot picks up on that. Well, everybody picks up on that. I just love that idea. Mia overcomes death when Maya channels her, yeah, but she transcends death in another way, because Phoenix learned so much from her and he's using that knowledge to impact other people's lives. You might think it's cheesy or sappy of me, but it makes me feel better to know that it is possible to live on after death in at least that way. I don't know if we have souls or what happens to us when we die, and it, you know, terrifies me slightly to think that my existence could in fact cease altogether.
Wow, I didn't intend to write about PW at all when I started writing this - I was going to write about how Pittsburgh apartment searching went (TERRIBLE) and how I started playing Xenosaga Ep. II (AWESOME) and how today there's a baby in my house and taking care of babies is a lot of work (TIRING). My sleep schedule is all messed up because I've been playing Xenosaga at night until 5 am, so I'll probably be the one to hold and feed Lily when she wakes up. The dogs won't stop barking at every little noise, and she keeps waking up. ;; Lily is the only baby Emma knows, and Emma won't leave her alone. She has to lick her feet and stand on her hind legs to watch her sleeping. She's the ultimate baby stalker.
I'll update about Pittsburgh and Xenosaga later (tomorrow?). Now I'm going to go make a cup of tea, see if my mom needs help with the baby, and possibly do good deeds for people in Xenosaga II because I am a good person and told a bunny that I would.
Edit: Oh, yeah, I saw Bruno with Ben! It was actually a lot better than I thought it was going to be. For an excellent review, see Ben's entry here.
Edit 2: Was filled with fond memories of ficcing while I looked through old stuff I have written. Am seriously considering doing fic requests because that would get me writing again and it'd give me something fun to do while in between job hunting and playing games. |
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| "Maybe YOU should be stripped naked and run out for making a mockery of this court!" |
[Jul. 1st, 2009|04:11 pm] |
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| |  geeky | ] |
You'd like that, Edgeworth, wouldn't you? :B PW IS SO GAY HOW CAN PEOPLE NOT SEE IT.
Don't know if any of you in the US saw, but Erie was on the national weather news yesterday! For our massive amounts of flooding. There were a couple streets that were underwater and houses that had their first floors half submerged. Our mayor was going around helping rescue people from their cars. I'm gonna go ask my sister if she has a disposable camera so I can take a picture of the house near our Target - this guy's pond exploded, with the end result that his shed is half underwater and probably at least one of the floors of his factory-thing is totally underwater. Ducks = happy, dude = not so much.
So after watching half The Count of Monte Cristo last night because it was a pirated copy and cut out (cue us screaming in horror, even though we've seen in a couple times before), Kaity and I went flood-watching. Most of it had cleared out, though. 'Cept for the deal with that guy's pond I just mentioned. He's pretty much fucked.
I was actually at Ben's house in Pittsfield when I saw the news. I had only been planning to stay for a night because Buddy's been sick and not eating so much, but then he started feeling better. Since I only packed one change of clothes and had already turned my underwear inside out, I decided to go home, but it was mostly because I was worried about the people I know in Erie. Luckily, I think nobody I know personally got screwed over.
Ben's birthday was the 29th! 8D He's a ripe old 23 now. I got him these things called Cool Feet which are suction feet you stick on your laptop so it doesn't overheat (he seemed happiest about this), a bento box with flying cats on it, and a really good smelling orange block of Lego-shaped soap.
We're getting things lined up for Pittsburgh! Even his parents were getting in on it. Like his mom sat down at the computer and had to have the address of one of the apartments we were considering so we could all look at it on Google Earth. So far, we have three appointments lined up for July 6th! And we're probably going to go to a CareerLinks there, which we heard about from a friend of Ben's. It's free, and they hook you up with a resume and try and help you get a job. I'm all for it!
This hilarious guy named Ron who sounds just like Bill's brother from Kill Bill informed me, "Well, there's a bunch of culinary art students living there... I dunno if that bothers you. I mean, they're not nosier than most people, but..." Me: "Er, sounds good to me!" When I told Ben about this story, he got extremely excited about the prospect of living with culinary students. Like VERY excited for some reason. XD Well, at least it'd smell good in there (hopefully?).
Last night, Ben said if we ever get two cats who are brothers, we should name them Albert and Caesar, after the characters from Suikoden III. Moments like that, I think we're meant for each other.
Edit: Man, it feels good to have bras that fit me again. 34B represent! I dropped a whole cup size in a year and still only weigh 112-114. Oh well. |
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| Lolllll |
[Jun. 27th, 2009|03:24 am] |
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| |  agh my head | ] |
cornbread4unme (1:37:07 AM): I just got done rescuing 13 people from the giant human-hating monsters
cornbread4unme (1:37:10 AM): One of them was a cat
cornbread4unme (1:37:24 AM): named Francois
tw3kr (1:37:46 AM): Did you... murder Francois?
cornbread4unme (1:38:22 AM): WHAT NO
Telling Ben about the Gnosis. :D
Props to Jr. for his running-and-moaning/panting session. Totally forgot about that until he interrupted my thoughts with it.
( Light spoilers. )
Ben and I are looking at apartments in Pittsburgh! We're making a list of places to check out. I gotta say that I've got my heart set on the cheapest with all utilities included (!), right next to Frick Park, with a Pepto-pink bathroom. Who knows what it's like in person, though? I need to get out of here before I end up on Dr. Phil. :/
ALSO I would like to say - after speaking with ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) moontear, Wild ARMS: Alter Code F sounds like it's a lot more fun than the original I was playing. I should've gotten that one. It actually would've been cheaper, too, I think? |
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| BOOKS ARE MADE OF PAPER |
[Jun. 26th, 2009|01:50 am] |
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| |  excited | ] |
This announcement brought to you by Mary, of Xenosaga.
I just, just got to this part but wasn't expecting it because I forgot at what point Jr. drops in with his Wizard of Oz line. Which should be the first clue to anyone that he is fucking awesome. And it was so much better than the first time I played because then my thoughts were, "...Disembodied voice? Where'd this kid come from?"
Also, so much more appreciation for Ziggy this time 'round. I was reminded I was in the presence of something magical when I was running through that place with MOMO - it's amazing how the characters' personalities work with each other. I can totally buy the development of their relationships, because they're multilayered and complex, like the characters themselves.
If you're wondering why I'm saying all this, it's because I was desperately in need of a game like this shiiiiit son
Suikoden Tierkreis = huge disappointment. D: It didn't even feel like I was playing a Suikoden game. I know a lot of people hated 4 (I didn't think it was that bad, even though it was my least favorite...until this one), but that at least retained some of the classic Suikoden elements. Also, it's just boring and brings nothing to the table, which I think is my main problem with Wild ARMS. The battle system and the plot just bore the hell out of me. And Wild ARMS does this thing where you THINK you've run away, because the screen gets dark and the music fades...only then the battle screen comes back into focus and a thing pops up saying, "You were too slow!" I can literally feel my blood pressure spike when this happens SWEET JESUS D: D: D: It happens 80% of the time when you run away, too, I feel like.
Curry curry curry. Watch me take mah curry to Cherenkov. I read this FAQ earlier because I couldn't find a key on the Elsa, and it referred to him as Andrew all the time. For some reason, this made me laugh, and I showed it to Kaity and it made her laugh, too. My favorite one was "SHOWDOWN WITH ANDREW." He's just not someone I would ever call by his first name unless I was his mother.
...Who is probably dead by now. His life really does suck. :C |
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| More proof I need to get a job |
[Jun. 25th, 2009|03:23 am] |
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| |  relaxed | ] |
Ballllls. I haven't been able to find much good fanfic lately. (I haven't been looking super hard, either, but still.) I know it's usually not a good idea to click on a story if they spell summary as "summery" and yeah, I know that's making me sound like a snob. ...Maybe.
*breaks out into Mulan song* THIS IS WHAT YOU GIVE ME TO WORK WITH~ WELL HONEY I'VE SEEN WORSE~
I clicked it, anyway. The phrase "rode out his orgasm in guilty waves" will stay with me for a while.
Also, I was bored and felt like my stomach region was aflame so I balanced a hairclip on top of it to test how much it was quivering. Answer: a lot. I even held my breath and it was still jiggling all over the place. Now, I'm no scientist, but that just seems abnormal.
Update on RL:
- Got back from the writer's conference a few days ago, and it was awesome. I told Jon I would update LJ with how it went down, so I probably should. I'm just too lazy to right now.
- Gave my mom the best birthday ever, complete with a Dairy Queen cake. Ooh, I want to go eat some now. My sister put streamers everywhere. We were working together in harmony! It was delightful. My mom's gift was some art I bought from Etsy. Weiner dog and bunny art. Yarp.
- Made my dad cry because of how utterly awesome my Father's Day gift was. Then he left for Alaska for a job.
- I started replaying Xenosaga last night with Jason. MORE ON THIS LATER FUCK I LOVE THIS GAME |
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| Maybe there's a cat god |
[Jun. 6th, 2009|08:31 am] |
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| |  pleased | ] |
And that cat god loooooves Buddy. His mouth is clearing up!! ♥ I can't believe it. When I think about it, it makes sense - the vet said a while ago that the virus in his mouth might get worse with stress, and being in pain all the time would stress me out greatly. Since he's not in pain anymore because of his meds, he's not as stressed out. I'm very happy about this. And so is Buddy. :3
However, he's likely to get pretty stressed out at the end of the month, as Ben and I are moving. We have no set destination in mind. Seriously. I'm having a hard time living without him, though. I saw him almost every day for a year.
Also, my parents are stressing me out a bit, especially my dad, with my future plans or lack thereof. I'm feeling suffocated. :x They also made a huge deal about Ben and I taking a nap together, fully-clothed, in the middle of the day. We had fallen asleep while snuggling. Because we're not married, this is
Solution: get in a car with Ben (and probably Buddy, unless we move some place close, like Pittsburgh, in which case I'll come back for him when we're unpacked and it's less stressful) and have AN ADVENTURE~~ I started packing last night. I got invited to another writer's conference in Chautauqua at the end of the month, so I figure it'll be a lot easier on me to pack ahead of a time. (I'm excited for that and can't believe my teachers invited me after I graduated. The school's paying for everything. :D) Also, my room was dusty, and I don't feel like dusting all that stuff again.
I rolled my massive rock collection in Saran Wrap to keep it safe, and it looks like a bright red rock loaf now.
I finished gift shopping for the following events yesterday: my sister's and mom's graduation, Ben's birthday, my mom's birthday, and Father's Day. (I still need to get something for Amanda, since her birthday is July 1st.) Everything happens in June. I love gift shopping, though, and I GOT THE BEST GIFTS EVER. I can't wait to see everyone's faces.
Oh, and my gram is here so she can witness Kaity's graduation. We're both up early in the morning together right now, because I fixed my sleeping schedule. So! A little bit of packing today, maybe some Wild Arms and/or Phoenix Wright, and hopefully Little Miss Sunshine at night because my grandma and mom haven't seen that movie yet. |
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| Barffff |
[Jun. 4th, 2009|05:13 pm] |
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| | grossed out | ] |
There's a reason spaghetti isn't made with ramen noodles.
Edit: Hurrrrr
- In the Great Seal of the United States the eagle grasps 13 arrows and testicles.
- Testicles are the largest of Saturn's moons.
- Testicles once lost a Dolly Parton lookalike contest.
- The pupil of an octopus's eye is shaped like testicles!
- Koalas sleep for 22 hours a day, two hours more than testicles.
- The air around testicles is superheated to about five times the temperature of the sun.
- Fish travel in schools, but whales travel in testicles.
- Testicles never said 'Play it again, Sam'!
- Bananas don't grow on trees - they grow on testicles!
- The opposite sides of testicles always add up to seven.
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| Melancholy to the point that three cups of tea won't fix it |
[May. 30th, 2009|04:52 am] |
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| |  sad | ] |
Augh, I can't sleep. I've been having trouble sleeping lately, partly because my sleeping schedule's all out of whack, partly because I'm so restless and anxious about my future after graduating a couple weeks ago. Also, I have no medical insurance now. :x And no anti-depressants. I have to call my doctor to get a refill because my last bottle said "no refills." Unfortunately, there is no time limit on my depression. I've also been kind of lonely and depressed, anyway, because all my friends (except for Jason! he's the one returning friend) have left Erie. Ben's on vacation in Virginia Beach this week with his family because he is LUCKY~~ ♥ but of course I miss him, and he's going to live with his parents for the summer.
Also, Buddy's anti-virals aren't working again. Pretty much the only thing that is are his pain pills, which (my dad informs me) are actually the same pain meds humans take. A month's supply is only $7, but they make him completely high out of his mind and his mouth is still bleeding and terrible. I don't know what path I should take anymore with this. He's my best friend, and he trusts me. The thought of letting him down and allowing him to suffer horrifies me. He's not in pain while he's on these pain pills, though, because he doesn't yowl all the time like he used to and he's become chipper and playful and crazy. But part of me feels like it's messed up that he has to be high to be happy anymore.
( About the greatest cat I've ever had the pleasure of knowing. )
I know for a fact I wouldn't be the same person I am today if it hadn't been for Buddy. And maybe some people think I'm over-the-top and just plain ridiculous for thinking something like that. That's okay if they think that. But I know I owe it to him, after everything he's given to me, to keep on fighting for him. I've been doing some research. He has feline stomatitis, and I discovered that there's a $2300 treatment out in Connecticut that could possibly cure him of it. It's a very extreme operation because the jawbone itself is operated on, but the people who've had it done to their cats (at least by the accounts I've read) insist their cats are healthy and happy afterwards. I know that a lot of times trying to treat pets for things like cancer can not only fail but possibly increase their suffering, but this seems different. I don't know what to do.
I'm going to ask our vet what she thinks, and...there's the problem with the money. I have $1000 in the bank, no job even though I am actively looking (I'm going to call a store today to see if they looked at my app), and my dad's been unemployed for a while. I'm sure my family won't agree with my idea, anyway. My sister told me that "he's old, anyway." He's thirteen, yeah, but other than his mouth he is pretty damn healthy. I wouldn't be surprised if he could live for five more years. The thought of waiting for infection to spread to his organs or for his jaw to rot out is fucked up. It sickens me. Yeah, I know how crazy my idea seems considering I don't have health insurance for myself, but I made a committment to always take care of him.
Opinions/advice/personal experiences with something like this and how you handled it = very welcome, guys. I feel a bit lost right now. |
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| Adventuuuuure |
[Apr. 10th, 2009|12:17 pm] |
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| | excited | ] |
And I seriously need it. I'm going to NYC with Jon, Keith, and Ben and am going to meet up with Jason there. AWESOME AWESOME AWESOME I CAN'T WAIT. I'll be back later on Easter Sunday.
I've been kind of down lately - mostly stressed out because of school and there's always tension in the house because of my family. My parents are apparently not getting a divorce (my dad changed his mind the day after), but my dad tried to move back in the other day and my sister ran away. He left the next day, and she returned. The problem is that my parents are out of money for him to live in a hotel/motel/insert other here. She doesn't want him to come to Easter dinner (which I won't be home for) and told my mom she was cruel for allowing him to come.
He's sober now since he came back from rehab. Granted, he's been sober plenty of other times and has bounced right back into drunkenness. I feel conflicted. I've been through absolute hell with him, but I can't help loving him. He's still my dad. I often feel like I have no opinions or emotions regarding him moving back in or divorcing my mom, though, except for the effect it has on my mom. I never know what's going to happen. He's definitely not a stable force in my life.
Anyway, now that I set that up, I was crying last night, and Peyton overheard me and got up a couple rooms away. I stopped crying, but she searched for me anyway and nuzzled and licked me. ♥ ♥ ♥ It's like she kind of hugs people, the way she puts her paws up and rests her head against their chests. So that's what she was doing. I stopped crying, and she waited for a couple of minutes and then walked away to go back to bed. It's weird because she's normally such a...uhhhh rambunctious dog, always roughly playing with Emma and Buddy, which pisses him off. But she was so gentle and kind. My little Grinch heart was like boom BOOOM BOOOOOOOM when she snuggled me.
And the kitchen is pretty much unpacked! There was so much packing paper everywhere. It was like a kitty Christmas for Buddy. Speaking of kitties, Jon showed me the best cat wig site ever.
I bought some tulips the other day, dyed eggs with Ben, and bought my cap and gown for graduation. Also, I'm not going back to work at Tim Hortons, which is probably for the best. I'm applying for FYE, and I really hope I get it. :3 |
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| Milk goes soggy more quickly than Ben |
[Apr. 4th, 2009|02:07 pm] |
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| |  curious | ] |
Stolen from ruby_shards:
- Devoid of his cells and proteins, ben has the same chemical makeup as sea water.
- Ben once lost a Dolly Parton lookalike contest.
- On stone temples in southern India, there are more than 30 million carved images of ben!
- Ben is often used in place of milk in food photography, because milk goes soggy more quickly than ben!
- The number one cause of blindness in the United States is ben.
- Ben can run sixty-five kilometres an hour - that's really fast!
- Over 2000 people have now climbed ben, with roughly ten percent dying on the way down.
- If the Sun were the size of a beach ball then Jupiter would be the size of a golf ball and ben would be as small as a pea.
- The state nickname of Iowa is 'The ben state'.
- The fingerprints of ben are virtually indistinguishable from those of humans, so much so that they could be confused at a crime scene.
I did one too, but Ben's is more funny.
Over 2000 people have now climbed Ben YOU-- YOU WHORE
I'm addicted to Dexter and am about to watch the first season finale. Ahhhh Dexter watch out for the ICE TRUCK KILLER obsessed about you oh my goodness augh. |
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| Blehh ha;jds;lkdsjjl;dl;jk |
[Mar. 31st, 2009|09:21 am] |
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| |  drained | ] |
I've been having a crappy time of things lately, what with puking at my own presentation for a bit of my thesis at a national English conference (luckily, only like 7 people were in the room) and my dad announcing to my mom that he wants a divorce as of yesterday. I have to poop something out for class today, though, so rather than talk about that stuff, I'll just address something that pisses me off.
( Warning: disturbing and will probably make you angry. )
I guess children being used as vehicles for propaganda and hateful beliefs pisses me off in general, but wow. Not only are kids are too young to have well-formed opinions about certain things, but there are other useful things you could be teaching them. Shit like this almost makes me want to have kids, since I could obviously do a much better job than these assholes. I can't imagine growing up and seeing a picture of yourself wearing something like that. It's worse than that vest my mom made me wear for picture day in the fourth grade.
Edit: Oh, but at least my family has our oven back. Who wants some freshly-made, non-microwaved tea SEASONED WITH TEARS AND PAIN? Hahahahaaugghgggughhhughgusobsobsobsob |
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| Hahahaha |
[Mar. 21st, 2009|03:35 pm] |
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| |  amused | ] |
Stolen from ghostbee:
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| Oh my god Suikoden Tactics |
[Mar. 20th, 2009|04:37 pm] |
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| |  confounded | ] |
A list of grievances:
- How long it takes to do, well, everything.
- NPCs, especially Lazlo when he's an NPC, are not too bright. When you have 20 HP and this giant freaking crab thing is like MWARRRWWARRR, should you go up to it or heal yourself? Come on, man.
- There aren't 108 characters you can recruit, and it's a Suikoden game. I guess that makes sense to some extent, since Kyril isn't a Tenkai star, but...why isn't he? Actually, there are no stars. What the eff. The only good thing about this is that I'll finish this game sooner. I'm mostly in it to see what happens and because I don't want to admit defeat.
- It's not Final Fantasy Tactics. I guess this isn't a fair complaint since I've never played a tactics game as good as that.
Good things:
- Hervey and Sigurd.
- Nalleo has an axe now?!
- I like Kyril's little family unit he's got going on with Andarc and Seneca.
Yeah, so mainly, I just wanted to complain about Lazlo dying and me not being able to recruit him. Seriously, I've tried this battle like eight times.
Edit: Also, my dad is back from rehab but is still staying in a motel. Not sure how this is going to play out. |
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| Happy St. Patrick's Day |
[Mar. 17th, 2009|10:56 am] |
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| |  cheerful | ] |
Happy St. Patrick's Day! I might go have a couple of drinks with my family. Going to appreciate that peaceful, friendly drinking atmosphere before my dad gets out of rehab this Sunday.
As for now, I'm totally making a doll version of myself. Remember the joy that was this? YEY. |
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| Hello salamander |
[Mar. 12th, 2009|05:47 pm] |
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| | curious | ] |
Peyton-face has a cone wrapped around her head, as she just got spayed. So sad! ;_;
Also. Uh. There is a salamander in a bowl next to me. Yes. Our basement flooded AND our pipes full of waste water and just plain poop got blocked or something (possibly because of rags my dad put over the holes of the pipes, possibly they tell us) and speeeeewed crap everywhere (I think in the basement, especially because when we flushed the toilet, we heard water rushing down there). So I was picking up dirty laundry covered in gross water, and there was just this little salamander by some slippers.
I don't know what to do with the salamander. I'm afraid it'll get stepped on/eaten by the cats, but maybe if I put it down in a moist section of the basement where no one ever goes? This happened once before, and I just put it outside, but that was in summer. It snowed today. Oh dear oh dear. Poor salamander. It seems to have gotten the end of its tail bitten off or something, too. I would give it a proper pronoun title, but I'm not sure if it's male or female. Forgive me, salamander.
I've basically been spending my break replaying Suikoden 4. Now I only have Snowe Fingerbang left to recruit, and he won't show up as scheduled. Of course he has to be a pain in the ass about everything. |
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| Heylo dalring |
[Mar. 7th, 2009|05:05 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | relaxed | ] |
HAPPY 5 MONTH ANNIVERSARY BENJAMIN BUTTON, my non-abusive boyfriend! yes that is a Chris Brown reference
Coincidentally, I stole a signficant other meme from moontear and because I'm babysitting two chilluns while they play Paper Mario, now is a good time to do it.
( Correct me if I'm wrong, Ben. :D )
Ayup. So babysitting Justice and Zander, ages 9 and 4 respectively, until tomorrow morning. I'm getting $75 to $100 for this, which is AWESOME. There's nothing like babysitting chrilden to make you simultaneously realize how badass and full of neat toys your room is, but also how a meal of vegetable juice and toast with brie is weird food that only grown-ups would eat. I told Justice that I played Sonic the Hedgehog for the first time twelve years ago. Feel so oooold.
I saw the midnight premiere of Watchmen and was super excited because I read the comic. In a word? DELIGHTFUL. Okay, so the soundtrack was horrendous, and the violence was a little gratuitous at points (I didn't think it'd be possible to have more violence than in the comic), but it was extremely faithful to the comic and sosososo cool. It doesn't matter that I disagree with philosophies of the characters - it's smart and well-put together anyway and badass. I don't even know where to begin.
Also, cheered at the inclusion of SNOW OWL SUIT.
I'd put pics of our new puppy, Captain Peyton Teake Aslan (my mom and sister only acknowledge Peyton Teake as her name but pssshh), but I can't find the camera! She's very cute, though, and already housetrained yaaaay. She's very friendly but a little...erm, too friendly at times with Emma and Buddy. She doesn't seem to realize how strong she is and paws at them a lot. The first meeting between Buddy and Peyton went like this:
Peyton: *pees in excitement* *runs up and liiiiicks the side of Buddy's head*
Buddy: :E *hiiiiiisss*
And as I was writing this, she came up and snuggled me, aw.
She was found wandering outside by herself in the snow, covered in scratches, at 3 months old. Now she's about 4 months old. I'm guessing they're going by her teeth. We adopted her at our vet's and think she's some kind of terrier/lab mix, judging by her mustache, beard, coat, and long legs. ♥ |
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| . |
[Jan. 14th, 2009|11:51 am] |
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| |  worried | ] |
So, I was informed last night after a really long day at school with a dead phone that Buddy's jaw is in fact crumbling. The vet said she's never seen anything like it. They had to take a piece of the bone and send it off to some lab.
When I went in today to bring him home, I had a ton of questions, but the lady at the desk was busy with surgery, didn't have answers, and was plainly stressed out and busy. She told me the results are probably going to be in anywhere from Friday to Monday.
They're looking to see if the sample is "tumorous," my dad told me. It was so weird to walk in the vet place and see a box with a piece of him in it on the counter.
If this sounds a bit detached, it's because I spent last night bawling and have had to force myself to come to terms with what's going on. I hate this. I hate the possibility of having to make a decision about whether to put Buddy to sleep. He can't survive with cancer or without a bottom jaw. I'm somebody who was optimistic in my hope that Buddy would pass away in his sleep at a much older age, like eighteen or twenty, but that probably isn't going to happen now. I love Buddy and can't bear to see him suffer. It's unfair to him.
I feel like an asshole for complaining about my dad last night. He's started washing his hands (?! I know, I know) and is upset about Buddy, too. He was too upset to even process some of what the vet was telling him over the phone, I guess, because he knew how much this would devastate me but had to tell me. He paid the $300-some vet bill today and didn't even complain. My family's being so kind to me.
Buddy's home, and even though he's missing his top row of teeth (they couldn't do the bottom row because of his jaw), he seems to be pretty active and happy to be home. I gave him pain medicine and an antibiotic pill.
I just can't imagine my life without him. |
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| Me + companion cube = tru luv |
[Jan. 5th, 2009|06:50 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  busy | ] |
I GUESS I'M WEIRD ABOUT MAH NAKEDNESS IN MIXED COMPANY GUIZ. I'm overly concerned about being polite and people feeling awkward in some situations (last one specified) and not enough in others (haha farts and talking about disgusting things while people eat). But everyone's got individual quirks, I guess.
I BEAT PORTAL. <3333 Am so downloading that one song now, and I want my own companion cube. What an awesome game. I realize I'm a bit behind, but I have had very little exposure to the XBox.
Sewing a zombie made of felt with a dangling eye and stitched-on nipples brb. |
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| Happy Christmas Eve! |
[Dec. 24th, 2008|01:15 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | cheerful | ] |
By the time I post this, it'll be Christmas Eve. :D
One of my goals for the new year is going to be updating more. If you got comments for things you wrote over a week ago, it's because I haven't checked my flist in forever. I still love you guys. ;;
It should be easy considering I'll only have three classes. SCORE. Although one of them is at 8 in the morning, ugh. But everybody I know is going to be in there and suffer with me, including my thesis advisor/favorite teacher, so there are worse things to happen. I got straight Bs (well, pluses and minuses and just plain Bs) this semester, except for the 1 credit required Creative Writing thing, which doesn't count because you only have to attend meetings and readings once and a while. My mom made a little disappointed sound when I told her and asked why. I said because I had a ton of classes and didn't do all my work.
BUT I PASSED SHAKESPEARE. <3333 NEVER HAVE TO TAKE IT AGAIN. THANK JESUS. I haven't failed a single class in college yet or gotten a D, even. So even though I didn't make the honor roll (I don't think), I'm proud of myself. Next semester, it's Canon and Its Critics, a gen ed art course - Art 001 lawls, and Creative Writing Theory. Also, my thesis and possibly the lit. magazine.
OH OH OH. I didn't mention this here yet, but I have to sign up for it. I've been offered along with another fiction writer to go to this PCEA (Pennsylvania College English Association) thing during the spring. To represent my school and read aloud and try to win! :O It's a lot of pressure. I hope I do okay. I can't believe I was chosen. I'm a lazy individual who still has a long way to go.
I've been sewing presents (made Ben a banana!) and making chocolate covered pretzels since I'm poor, but I think it worked out for the best since all my homemade projects are turning out really well. I got tea from my cousin Becca which is always great, a Zelda shirt from Beth, and a ton of things from Ben including cute watermelon earrings, a Pikachu hat that a burgalar might wear, a mug, a belt with a cat on the buckle, and an awesome David Sedaris book that I finished reading in less than a day. He's my favorite nonfiction author, definitely.
Also, I got cards from moontear, topazeyes, crystalcattail, raynala, and my aunt Lisa. Thank you, guys! ♥ I feel so loved and lucky. This was a good year for friends. Thanks for being there for me.
About my last post, I was kind of a douche to assume the religious thing about Ben, so this is me publicly apologizing for that. It spawned out of me comparing Jesus to Santa Claus without thinking he'd care, and Ben didn't like that very much. That's the kind of thing you don't say around people who are Christians because it'd be douchey, but I thought since he's an agnostic he wouldn't care. I think it's really more of a respect thing, though. |
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| In memoriam of one of the grumpiest dogs I've ever known |
[Dec. 7th, 2008|03:41 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  awake | ] |
R.I.P. Lucky
1997 - November 26, 2008
Despite the number of times you growled at me for attempting to sit next to you, disrupting your sleeping arrangement, carrying a camera near you or pointing it at you, and catching you in the process of eating our food on the table or counter, I'd be lying if I didn't say it's strange without you here. Yeah, you sometimes mistook my hand for a piece of cheese, but I know that was an accident (though I was pretty pissed when it did happen).
So, yeah, Lucky was put to sleep the day before Thanksgiving, which was awful timing for my mom, but I can't imagine him even going on another day. It was terrible to even look at him, most of the time. His back legs were withered (it feels weird/uncomfortable to write about him in the past tense, wow) and his back half was hunched over from his weakened hips. His feet were often at odd angles. The vet and my dad wondered how much pain he had really silently been enduring. Add to that that he was unable to handle his bowels once or twice a week, he was almost completely blind, his ears weren't healing up from their infections, and the skin on his legs was raw and red from allergies and his gnawing on it. He was like a walking corpse.
A couple days before we took him to the vet, he collapsed outside the house in the snow, and my dad had to carry him inside.
( On saying goodbye. )
I thought, "Why would anybody want a dog?" watching her suffer like that. Then I came home to Buddy and was reminded of why. Their lives are usually so short in comparison to ours, but I'd like to think that there are few things as wonderful as the kind of relationship animals and people can have. It's a deep level of understanding and unconditional love that goes beyond words. I love waking up to Buddy headbutting me.
In the waiting room, before we put Lucky down, I read an article that as you pet cats, their blood pressure goes down, and I smiled. Lucky had a pretty good life. My mom and he really loved each other. I think back to that first day we got him, when my mom, holding Lucky, and my sister and I knocked on my grandma's door and how she looked so shocked. Her mouth literally made an O. She had been living by herself, and all the sudden, my mom came along with two girls, two cats, and a dog, and now she was adding another one. But he turned out to be her favorite dog and lived with her a year when he couldn't with us.
We have a tin of his ashes now, and my mom wants to be buried with them someday. Ben thought that was pretty weird (he actually did a kind of double-take and went, "What?!" and looked all freaked out), but I don't think that's too strange.
I actually got Nintendogs a couple of days ago and have had fun with it. I have a Dachshund named Elly and a Husky named uh Barack. YES I KNOW I'M A NERD OKAY. But I'm finding it pretty lacking in comparison to the real thing. I don't even want to get the cat one, I think, because I heard it wasn't that good and because my cat is Buddy, so obviously those fake cats are going to look like poop compared to him.
My sleeping schedule is balls.
Edit: Sorry to everyone I was talking to on AIM! :o My Internet kept dying, so I was just like, aw screw it. |
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